On my way to round lake again this weekend, it’s ricky’s grandfathers funeral. I’m just really glad that it wasn’t his other grandfather. Ricky would have been devastated. Last weekend was pretty freskin awesome. I had a rare girly weekend for me, and it included going shopping with pam and liz which turned out really nice. I’m excited because the cruise is only a couple weeks away now.
I sortve love this drive to round lake because it’s quiet and one of those few times where ricky and I just get to listen to music and talk. I’m pretty sure that an iPhone is one of thosethngs where when you get one, you’re never the same afterwards. You’d have to pry this thing out of my cold dead fingers. It’s nice to not has to lug around whatever massive book reading as well.
I want to hang out wihe mike but I feel like it would be weird. I’ve stayed away from the whole friends with guys things since peter. It’s nowhere near he same thing though I guess. I had feelings for peter and mike is just my friend, but I’m just scared. Mike is my first real friend that I didn’t inherit jus by beings friends with ricky since the whole thing with holly. I mostly talk to mike on the Internet so it’s been safe until now.
I never said much yesterday about what actually has changed. It’s nothing specific really, it’s just this thing where we’ve both learned how to deal with our pet peeved for the other. I’ve learned so much from my relationship with ricky because he doesn’t ask or expect me to change for him – but I want to, so doing so is so much easier. It’s easier to take a deep breath before getting frustrated with him over repeating myself.
We are realistic with eachother which is something I appreciate more then I could ever have known. Ricky is finally someone who I can tell my greatest fears to without being ashamed of them. I’m not saying that we don’t fight or that we don’t have our faults because we do – but we both try and be a better person. Ricky works so hard to make sure I never have to doubt the fact that he loves me ever again. And I don’t doubt him anymore. I don’t have a constant feeli g or paranoia like I used to – I feel like when he’s with me that he’s actually there for me and not just because I happen to be someone he gets along with.
Sweet! Now that I can update from my phone, maybe I’ll do it a little bit more often. Everything has been really really great for the last couple of months actually. I’m sortve waiting for the other shoe to drop. Things never go this well for me! I’m just really happy to have ricky and some great friends along with an awesome job. Maybe I already paid my sucky time dues for awhile?
I’ve been reading the sword of truth books which are actually really good! There 11 books in the series and they’re all around 1000 pages or so, so they’re taking even me a little while to complete.
Well that’s about all for now!
