Rywn » madelin

Update

Sorensen — Thu, 02 Jun 2005 09:44:00 +0000

Well, here’s just a last weekish update. Went to Madelin’s, had a bunch of fun there and talked to one of her friends who I ended up areein to meet on Friday for coffee/dinner… heh. Go me! ^.~ Hmmm, not much has really happened otherwise except that I’ve come to the realization that I can’t hold onto any of my resolutions except for the one I made after watching Spanglish. Which I need to keep reminding myself of. Hmm, that’s really all there is to it. Whilst at Madelin’s I went to a bunch of Grad parties and etc.

- Andi

O.o

Sorensen — Tue, 09 Nov 2004 07:56:00 +0000

Wow…so I didn’t know people actually bothered to read my journal anymore. This is new information.

So I bought my train tickets for turkey day today, 51$ X.X;;;

S’ok, cause all Daddy said was “That’s not bad” which made me happy. I could stay a day later and later in the day cause he said I could. Wai!

Erm…not much going on. I got woken up at 5am today. And then again. 6 times later.

Didn’t appreciate that I’ll tell you.

Hmm…boring day. Went to class. Came home. Made dinner.

Going to see the Incredibles tomorrow! WOOOOHOOO! ^.~

And Hi to those who read.

-Andi (or Raya if you happen to be Randyo)

Slump.

Sorensen — Thu, 02 Sep 2004 09:52:00 +0000

Herm. I agree with my last entry. The one only friends can read.

And Pookie. “you can be in a crowded room and feel most alone you ever have in your life.”

which is very much how I feel right now. The most important thing to me in my life is my support friends. I can’t take when I don’t have them. Things build up and I get really really depressed. Not even happy things make me smile and the ones that are there are fake. I’m happy Madelin is coming, really. I can’t wait to see her.

I just wish that other things like… my website… and the people with it weren’t drifting away with the tide. I know I’ve said it. I know people have said they weren’t drifting, but I’m not blind.

I miss feeling loved…like…really. Not the my parents love me kind, but when friends are there for you even when you’re wrong kind.

I’ll find it, one day I know. Just right now I’m drowning and there’s nobody there to save me. My lifeline took a hike for a week and I think it’s the worst thing that could’ve happened. Now I just feel pissed off and sad. I might not be in love with him, but Josh is still the one I talk too. I know you’re there Pookie but sometimes you’re just…not there.

I don’t like calling people anymore. They don’t answer or they don’t call back or get off the phone with me. I feel rejected. It sucks.

I don’t know. I’m so confused these days.

I’m lost, confused, trapped and alone.
This world is surrounding me, entrapping me,
and I’m looking to and fro.
Drowning and Suffocating, drained and despaired.

Please help me, find my misguided soul.
Show me the way out of this labrynth of melancholy
Lead my along roads better lit
and save me from the ghouls in my head.